4

Covered_in_sponges drags the X-Men through various alternate universes; the series: season 2
3183   62

  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    2

    After Ghostrek's disappointing review, I did a lot of soul searching; even considered abandoning the project in despair.

    But then I though to myself... "Despair? Des pair of nuts."

    ::grabs genitalia::

    I'll be my own hype man; and this project is not ogre.

    It's never Ogre.

    Still haven't read the first part ::cough:: @ghostrek ::cough::?

    X-Men vs. Aliens vs. Predator -

    http://boards.adultswim.com/topic/7211/covered_in_sponges-presents-x-men-vs-aliens-vs-predator-a-fanfiction-written-by-covered_in_sponges?page=1

    Skipped the first season?

    X-men + Cowboy Bebop + Firefly- (currently sporting an impressive -22 reputation)

    http://boards.adultswim.com/topic/13885/covered_in_sponges-drags-the-x-men-through-various-alternate-universes-the-series?page=1

    Don't want to read the whole thing, but would like to have some rough idea of what is going on here?

    M_D's delightful review of season 1.

    http://boards.adultswim.com/topic/14165/md-reviews-cisdtxtvau-the-series/2?page=1

    Boy howdy, I wonder where I'll be taking them this season...

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • Thunder Goddess
    0

    Damn! And here I thought that this was the start of season 2.

    “None of us are saints.” – Albert Fish
    "You can't have everything. Where would you put it?" -- Stephen Wright


  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    2

    Episode 1- We have to say ‘happy holidays’ instead of ‘Merry Christmas’ because of SJWs

    “Oh my god, it’s finally winter break!” shouted Jubilee, the first student to burst through the door of Beast’s AP Physics classroom; small streams of sparks flashing excitedly from her fingertips. Prodigy was the next to exit, followed by a small flood of others who all chattered excitedly about their plans over break as they made their way towards the dormitory wing to pack. I smiled and nodded to the fellow members of the XAV club as I walked into the classroom. I knocked on the door before entering, as Beast was focused on gathering his teaching supplies.

    “Ah, Mr. Sponges,” he said with a polite smile; turning to me momentarily before finishing up his packing. “A couple of my students have told me some very… interesting things about a recent adventure you took them on.”

    “Well, hopefully they only told you the good parts…” I replied with a slight shrug and grin as I walked in.

    “Theoretically,” began Beast as he shuffled the final papers into a file and placed them in a stack on his desk. “Couldn’t you have just chosen to appear in a universe in which there were no bad parts for them to tell me about?” He stared at me for a moment, pondering me.

    “I could, but this universe has the most comfortable shoes. Seriously, you don’t know how good you have it here. It’s like walking on clouds. You uh… You need a hand with those?” I asked as I gestured to the stack.

    “It’s cool, I got them,” said Kitty Pride as she stepped out from a wall behind Beast, carrying another pair of folders which she added to the stack. Beast gestured towards the door and we all walked out of the room towards the offices section of the scholastic wing of the mansion.

    “So, I take it you’re here to watch us be chased by dinosaurs again?” said Beast as we walked down the hallway, bustling with students eager for their vacations.

    “Wow, how did you guess?” I said with a smile as we stepped through an open doorway at the end of the hall.

    “Well I’m out then,” said Storm as she passed us in the hallway with a bundle of files in her hands. “I’ve had more than enough dinosaurs for one lifetime.”

    “I’ll say.” I replied as we stepped into the office. Jean Grey and Scott Summers stood near the back of the room, retrieving files from one of the large cabinets that populated that part of the office. Across from them, Logan leaned on the counter top, sipping a cup of coffee.

    “Heya guys,” I said as we entered the office, Kitty and Beast both going directly back to the filing cabinets. They all nodded to me and continued with their work. “Anybody got any fun plans for the break?”

    “Yeah,” said Jean sarcastically as she shut the filing drawer, a massive stack of folders in her arms. “Grading essays.” She walked over to the table in the middle of the room, as Wolverine, the physical education instructor, quietly sipped his coffee again.

    “Don’t you wish you could just, get away?” I asked. “Nice little tropical vacation, maybe?”

    “We don’t have time for that type of thing,” said Scott with an annoyed tone as he sat down at the table next to her and opened the top folder of his stack, red pen in hand as he prepared to read through the first packet of papers.

    “It wouldn’t take any time at all,” I said as I walked over to the coffee machine and poured myself a cup, emptying several creamer cups into it. Logan looked at me judgingly. “What can I say, I like my coffee like I like my women.” I said as I stirred it and sat down. “Kind of weak from all the cream I put in. Anyways, like I was saying, I could actually get you guys back here before we left. In fact, I could make it so that when you guys walked into the room, you were all already here grading papers. How does that sound?”

    “That sounds like a contradiction to everything we know about the current laws of physics,” replied Beast, who had stopped filing papers to stare at me. “I would love to observe something like that.”

    “Plus, having doubles of ourselves would certainly help us get these things graded faster…” replied Jean.

    “Yeah, and the whole ‘tropical vacation’ part of it, let’s not forget that,” said Kitty.

    “That’s the part I trust the least,” replied Scott. “What’s the catch?” he asked, turning to look at me.

    “No catch,” I said innocently. “Just a couple of days of fun in the sun on an exclusive island resort…”

    “What island?” asked Scott suspiciously.

    “The beautiful and exotic Isla Nublar…” I began before Scott cut me off almost instantly.

    “Nope,” he said, turning back to his work. “I’m not going to run from dinosaurs again.”

    “Oh come on,” I protested. “We’re going to be going in like, a month or two before the movie, when everything was running smoothly and their biggest problem was some kid eating too much cotton candy and throwing up on one of the rides. It’s going to be so great you guys; they have a huge water park, 18-hole golf course, a freaking gondola… and fvcking dinosaurs. Seriously you guys, why aren’t we on our way there right now?” I looked over at Logan. “Come on, this sounds fun, right?”

    “Yeah, why the hell not,” he said gruffly. “I’m in.”

    “I must say, I’m quite intrigued by the prospect of ‘quantum leaping’ into the Jurassic World universe,” began Beast as he set his stack of essays down next to the filing cabinet. “But how would the denizens of that universe feel about my blue furry self on the water slides?”

    “Don’t worry about it; I can totally take us to a mutant friendly Jurassic World-having universe.” I replied.

    “Wow, professor McCoy, I can’t wait to see how you'd look on the beach,” said Kitty as she continued to file.

    “Same here,” he said with a slight chuckle. Kitty blushed slightly and he realized how his words had been interpreted.

    “Well, all right, I guess I’m in too then,” he stammered, averting his eyes as he tried to think of something to break the awkward silence. “Theoretically, if the other universe is identical to ours except for the fact that Jurassic World exists and the world is tolerant of mutants, wouldn't you have a moral obligation to transport mutants from less fortunate universes into it?”

    “Why, that’s a good question, Beast,” I replied. “While I’m at it, I probably have a moral obligation to go to all of the universes out there that consist of nothing but galaxies constructed of burning infants and puppies and try to put the flames out. There are an infinite number of them out there, because everything exists forever and ever. I mean, yeah I could transport every mutant from this universe to one of the infinite others out there but you’d all be the clones of the yous that were already there. I could swap you out, but that’d be another moral quandary; would you willingly subject your self to the negativity you are attempting to escape?”

    “Scott, Jean,” he said, drawing attention from himself. “Are the two of you coming?”

    “Come on Scott, I think it could be fun,” said Jean. “We don’t even have to look at the dinosaurs; we could just relax by the pool the whole time.”

    “Or explore the bamboo forest, or the massive botanical gardens.” I interjected. “Plus there’s an Imax theater, eight cafes and twelve sit-down restaurants on main street, and just tons of shopping. Dude, you can go to the spa all day and just spend the entire vacation there. Call room service and have them feed you while you’re getting a $300 massage baby, we goin’ all out.”

    “All right, fine.” Scott said with a sigh. “We’re coming along too.” Jean hugged his arm.

    “God damn it, Sponges!” shouted Charles as he wheeled towards the room. “Where are you taking them this time?”

    “You’re totally coming too,” I said as he rolled towards us. “You’re in a wheelchair so we can cut to the front of all the lines.”

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • Thunder Goddess
    1

    Well, this time, I understand...so far.

    “None of us are saints.” – Albert Fish
    "You can't have everything. Where would you put it?" -- Stephen Wright


  • Banned
    1

    Did ghost even post a review?


  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    1

    Well... sort of.

    I'd rather not talk about it.

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • Banned
    1

    Damn, i wish we were in a galaxy consisting of burning infants and puppies.


  • SwimSuperHero
    1

    I really like the last part about using Prof X to cut to the front of the lines.
    Good idea

    Usopp Fanatic since 2003.


  • Banned
    0

    I found it.

    Not gonna lie, I lol'd.


  • Banned
    0

    Now look I know we're all adults here and yeah it was a "creative" way to put out that enormous fire melting Antarctica, but did Cyclops really have to laser beam the ground and melt a tunnel straight through to the Earth's core so that Mr Fantastic could make a cameo and "f**k the planet's hot p***y hole" just right in order to cause a geogasm quake, creating tidal waves large enough to extinguish the continental blaze?

    Original, sure, memorable, definitely, but it was a little to silly and gross to fully appreciate.


  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    0

    That doesn't happen until season 3.

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    1

    Episode 2-Duh-dah, Duh-dah, Dah Nah na Nah na Nahh!

    “Dah Nah na Nahh! Dunadunadun dun, dun dun!” I sang loudly to myself; a wide grin on my face as the X-men within the helicopter I was piloting sat in annoyed silence.

    “Are you going to sing through the whole soundtrack?” asked Scott, finally fed up with my noise.

    “I had intended on it,” I replied as our helicopter raced past the final stretch of open ocean before the magnificent green sea walls of the island. Nestled upon the sheer rock face of the seaside cliffs, the ornately designed docks were packed with shuffling people as we passed above; the line for the monorail stretched back to the gangway of the massive cruise ship that was currently unloading passengers into the already overfull courtyard and waiting area.

    “Man, I am glad I didn’t bundle a cruise.” I said as we hovered over them for a moment before continuing further inland. “Nope, no standing in line for us; I sprung for the Exclusive First-Class VIP Package, or the EFCVIPP. In addition to skipping to the front of every line, we will also be staying in the penthouse suites of the gorgeous Isla Nublar Hilton; our every need being catered to by a full concierge staff. We will have unrestricted guided access to all facilities on the island; including those not open to the general public. Plus a luncheon meet-and-greet with the chief executives of the park. I’m planning on doing an Ian Malcolm impersonation during the entire thing. It’s going to be boss. And here we go…” I said as I landed the helicopter on the roof of the opulent hotel at which we would be staying. A group of well-dressed men and women walked across the rooftop helipad towards us as the rotors of our craft died down. “These’ll be your personal concierges,” I said as they opened the doors of the helicopter and gestured towards the door into the hotel, where another group of hotel employees stood with our luggage.

    We disembarked from the helicopter and followed them through the door and into the elevator leading to the penthouse suites.

    “Oh man, I want to feed one of every dinosaur species on this island.” I said as my personal concierge quickly pulled out a notebook and wrote that down in an itinerary. “I also want to pet one of every dinosaur on this island.” My concierge looked up at me with a questioning glance. “Write that down,” I said. “It’s happening.”

    The hotel personnel quickly showed us to our spacious and ornately adorned living quarters, complete with a large balcony deck that was communal among the rooms of the suite. As we sat around a large table overlooking the park I ordered champaign for the group. I ordered a whiskey sour for myself because I can’t stand champaign.

    “All right,” I said, as I looked over at the itinerary my concierge had put together for the evening. “It’s about 5:20 right now, which means if we hurry we can catch the last mosasaur feeding show for the day before heading down Main Street for a late dinner and drinks. Or, like I said, y’all can do whatever you want here. Just ask your concierge, and they’ll do their utmost to fulfill your request; don’t worry about the cost, it’s all on the house. Just don’t forget our meet-and-greet lunch with the executives starts at 11:30 tomorrow.” The alcohol arrived, and I raised my glass for a toast. “I’d like to thank each and every one of you for coming with me on this experience,” I began. “In the words of John Hammond; creation is an act of sheer will. Thank you all for joining me in it. Now, let’s drink this alcohol and go watch a giant shark get bit in half by a larger marine reptile. They’re even going to let me ride the shark out there and manually release the leftover half from the wire. Then I’m going to jump in and pet it.”

    “I’m sorry, but,” my concierge attempted to interject.

    “I am petting the fvck out of that mosasaur,” I said; cutting him off before draining my whiskey sour. “And I’m doing it now.” I stood and rose from the table. “I hope to see some of you in the audience, but like I said, it’s your choice.” With that I disembarked, my concierge at my heels.

    “What do you think?” asked Scott as he turned to the Jean, who was currently sipping her champaign while reading through a brochure of the many attractions of the park.

    “I don’t know, there’s just so much here to do,” she replied. “I’m thinking about maybe having a Spa day tomorrow for the both of us then a private reservation at Winston’s steakhouse for dinner... Oh, we could ride to the top of the gondola lift; the view would be amazing at sunset.”

    “I meant about this whole situation,” replied Scott. “Does anybody else feel like this all seems… unreal?”

    “No, Scott,” began the Xavier. “It all feels very real. And I’m absolutely certain it will end in catastrophe.”

    “Personally,” began Logan, “that’s half the reason I decided to come along. Until then, I think I’m going to go watch that shark get bit in half.” He set his half-finished champaign on the table and asked his concierge for a beer as they left for the show, Kitty and Beast following.

    “Logan is right, you two,” said Jean as she put the brochure down on the table where the three of them still sat. “If something is going to happen, then something is going to happen. Until it does, I say we enjoy ourselves a little bit.” She turned to look to Scott. “We don’t even have to go out,” she began. “We could just order room service and lock ourselves in the amazing suite; I saw a massive jacuzzi tub on our way through. Come on, what do you say?”

    “All right, fine,” he said, unable to pass up almost guaranteed hot tub sex. With that the pair retreated to their suite; leaving Xavier sitting on the balcony alone with his concierge.

    “Why don’t you trust me, Charles?” I asked as I suddenly appeared across the table from him.

    “I thought you were out getting ready to feed the dinosaur,” replied Charles.

    “Ok, first off; it isn’t a dinosaur. It’s a marine reptile that existed at the same time as the dinosaurs. The distinction is important. Secondly, I am, and I’m excited as balls. Thirdly; what the hell, man? What’s with the lack of trust in our relationship? I know all about your little switcheroo with Morph last season, trying to dig up dirt on me. Seriously, what is it? Don’t dodge the question this time.”

    “I do not trust you, Mr. Sponges, because you are inherently untrustworthy,” began Charles angrily. “Your very existence, your ability to manipulate the fabric of reality on such a profound level, and the irresponsible ways in which you use that power… You are the essence of chaos.”

    “You flatter me, sir,” I replied. “But actually I consider myself true neutral; in that all that I do balances itself out in the end. Listen; take some advice from your students. Relax, enjoy yourself. There’s no sinister ulterior motive here, I literally just wanted to go to the Jurassic World universe and figured I’d be nice and bring you guys along with me. Tell you what; in about half an hour here we’re going to be meeting up for dinner and drinks on main street. You should come down and join us.”

    “F**k Yes!” I suddenly shouted. “Sorry,” I continued. “The mosasaur just did the jumping out of the water thing. Now it’s time to jump in and pet it. I’m going to need all of my concentration for this part, Professor.” I said as I began to fade away. “Just promise me you’ll do something fun.”

    Charles was once again alone on the patio with his concierge, who maintained a constant polite silence throughout the entirety of the exchange. He smiled warmly as Charles looked over at him. With a sigh, Xavier grabbed the brochure from the tabletop and examined it for a moment.

    “All right, take me to Margaritaville then,” he said as he folded the brochure and placed it into his pocket. “I think I need another drink.”

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    2

    Episode 3- After a night out on the town

    The bright rays of an early morning equatorial sun shone through the jungle canopy above, the filtered illumination having a dappling effect on the already muddled ground; layers upon layer of gnarled roots and overgrowth surrounding me as I crept. The sounds of a placidly meandering river drifted through the greenery, as did the soft repetitive huff of a large animal breathing. I inched over a slight rise of the uneven terrain and saw the creature. Its mottled yellow-brown striped back was to me, as it stood knee deep in the shallow waters of the river. A flash of blue coloration surrounded its eyes and stretched down its elongated face; the crocodilian jaws of the creature opening and closing slightly as its sharp eyes combed the water for any trace of its fish prey. A twig beneath me snapped and the baryonyx whipped its long, strangely shaped snout in my direction and issued a low his as it became aware of my presence; the small quills running the length of the back of its skull standing intently. The eight foot tall dinosaur sunk down to its chest in the water and issued another rumbling hiss as it waited for me to reveal myself.

    “Hey now,” I said as I slowly rose. I held my hand out in front of me as I stood and faced the creature, which was currently baring its fearsome needle-like teeth at me. “Oh, who’s a good dinosaur?” I continued as I pulled a large slab of meat from the camouflaged sack which was nestled next to me in the underbrush. “Is it you?” I asked as the crocodile-like beast rose from the water and cautiously stalked towards me, still unsure. “Hey now, that’s a good dinosaur; yeah, good dinosaur.” I said as I waved the meat out into the space between us, the leathery fleshed baryonyx now fully out of the water and cautiously walking up the river bank towards my position among the trees. Like a crane spearing a fish, the dinosaur’s head darted forwards and s****hed the flesh from my hands, quickly swallowing it in a manner reminiscent of a crocodile imitating a seagull. Its cautious gaze never left me as I inched closer.

    “Yeah, that’s a good dinosaur,” I said as I stepped within reach of its massive hook-shaped claws, designed through millions of years of evolution to gut through a fish like a reptilian grizzly bear. It hissed at me as I reached out towards it leathery hide, but it did not move away or attempt to attack me. I hesitated before placing my hand on its pebbled skin and giving it a few smooth brushes. The creature allowed it to continue for a moment before turning to wade back into the river where it sank to its chest again; issuing a final low rumble as I turned to leave the enclosure.

    A guttural squawk replied from within the underbrush, as a pair of metriacanthosauruses stepped out from the tree line. They were a few feet shorter than the baryonyx which sat submerged in the river behind me; but they were bulkier, with a shorter snout and small bony protrusions above its eyes. I had been through their section of the enclosure earlier and had already fed and pet them, but they had followed me; tracking me. Hunting me. The one nearest to me gave another guttural squawk as the one behind it circled back around me, cutting off my retreat.

    “Hey now,” I said loudly with a tone that was equal parts authoritative and disappointed. “No. No you do not do that, you understand?” The larger of the two hissed as it prepared to charge me. The voidspear cracked into existence in my hands as I rushed towards the dinosaur instead. I shouted loudly as I swung out with intimidating slices which stopped in the air just short of the small theropod. My sudden attack had its intended consequence as the dinosaur realized it had vastly underestimated its quarry and quickly ducked back into the tree line, its compatriot slinking away in a similar fashion.

    “Excuse me, Mr. Sponges?” my concierge asked as I exited the enclosure and crossed the five dinosaur species of the Cretaceous Cruise section of the park off my list of species to feed and pet. “The executive meet and greet luncheon begins in an hour, shall we head back to the hotel to prepare?”

    “That’s an excellent idea,” I replied. “I can’t wait to see how everyone enjoyed their first night of winter break.

    The doors to executive elevator opened to reveal pair of concierges standing outside the door to Jean and Scott’s private suite.

    “What’s all this, then?” I asked as we approached.

    “Ms. Grey and Mr. Summers have asked us to inform you that they intend to spend this portion of their vacation relaxing in their room,” replied one of them as the other leaned against the wall and dicked around on his phone.

    “I see. Well, at least they’re enjoying themselves,” I said as I continued down the hallway to the Professor’s door. He opened it before I could knock, eyeing me suspiciously as he wheeled out into the hallway. I shrugged and went across the hall to Logan’s room, where a note on the door informed me he was spending the morning on a nature hike and intended to meet back up with us later that afternoon.

    “Huh, looks like we might be the only ones excited for our business luncheon with Claire.” I said in a friendly conversational tone as we walked towards Beast’s door.

    “No,” replied Charles icily. “I’m fairly certain you are the only one excited about it. I’m only coming along because I’ve decided it is in our best interests to keep a close eye on you.”

    “Wow professor,” I replied. “Way to just come right out into the open with your aggressions. I mean, you could have pretended you were having a good time, but no. You gotta be all suspicious about this omnipotent entity that just wants to come by and hang out. You know what? You’re a hypocrite Charles. People hate and fear your kind because the possess abilities they cannot understand, how are you being any different?”

    “The difference is,” replied Charles as we stopped and stared each other down in front of Beast’s door. “You pose a legitimate threat; you have repeatedly placed myself and others into harm’s way, seemingly for no other purpose than your own sick amusement.”

    I opened my mouth to reply as Kitty faded through the door; a shocked expression appearing on her face as she saw us. The shock gave way to a deep blush as she sprinted across the hallway and through the door of her suite, her small frame draped in one of Beast’s shirts. Charles furrowed his brow as I knocked on the door with a wide grin.

    “One moment!” shouted Beast as he rushed to put on underpants and opened the door; resembling his character from the X-men cartoon that aired in the 90’s. “Gentlemen,” he began. “Good morning.”

    “Beast,” Xavier scolded. ”She is your student, and half your age.”

    “Oh she’s twenty-five,” argued Beast. “And she’s a graduate student.”

    “And she’s not even the worst thing Beast was on top of last night.” I chimed in. “You remember after we left the VIP room at Orgins, when you demanded to be allowed to ride one of the baby triceratops; even though you were way over the weight limit? Poor thing couldn’t even stand, just laid there while you rocked back and forth pretending to be a cowboy.^ And you still got your weird-shaped dick wet.^^ My bet is Ms. Pride has wanted to jump on that for some time now. Good on ya, I say,” I said as I patted his blue, furry, presently very sweaty shoulder.

    The vein began popping out in Professor Xavier’s forehead as he opened his mouth to reply. His retort was cut off by the ding of the executive elevator which had arrived behind us. We turned to look as the doors opened, revealing a raven-haired woman in her late twenties holding a tablet. She walked towards us down the hall with the long confident strides of an individual of authority.

    “Hello,” she spoke with an accent which instantly revealed her British ancestry. “My name is Zara; personal assistant to Claire Dearing, operations manager of Jurassic World. She has requested that I personally escort you to your executive luncheon. Also, she sends an apology,” she continued. “Due to her understandably busy schedule, your meeting time has been double-booked.”

    “Double-booked?” I asked confusedly. “That’s not possible. Who else would be coming?”

    Zara tapped on the screen of her tablet for a few moments before looking back up at me.

    “Well, it’s your lucky day,” she replied. “It looks like you’ll be getting to sit in on a major deal between Ms. Dearing and an executive from Weyland-Yutani.”

    ^

    Request by @BanRaniel

    ^^

    Request by @Uncivillypandaka

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    2

    Episode 4- Seriously?

    The vein in Xavier’s forehead pulsed intensely as he glared at me.

    “Believe me; I’m right there with you,” I replied, a quizzical look on my face. “You think I’d double-book my own executive luncheon with the operations manager of Jurassic World? This is…” my defense fell silent as I analyzed the situation. “This isn’t me,” I said finally with a shake of me head; Xavier still glaring at me suspiciously.

    “Again,” Zara interjected, “Ms. Dearing apologizes profusely and asks that you understand that the challenges of her hectic schedule sometimes impose certain restrictions on the activities of… tourists such as yourselves.”

    “Would it be possible to change the reservation for a different time?” asked Charles.

    “What do you think I’m trying to do?” I asked him, furrows of slight frustration appearing on my brow. “It’s like I’m… locked out,” I replied.

    “Will it just be the three of you, then?” asked Zara, impatiently looking down at her watch as she cut into our conversation.

    “Four!” said Kitty Pride as she faded through the door of her suite; Beast’s over-sized white shirt replaced by a t-shirt protesting the treatment of animals in zoos. In her hand she held a large placard which read “Free the whales” above #JusticeForHarambe.

    “Wonderful,” said Zara as she turned and walked back towards the elevator. “This way, please.”

    “One moment, if you will,” asked Beast as he walked back into his suite. “I’m currently in, shall we say, quite the state of undress,” he continued with a chuckle.

    “Dude, don’t even worry about it,” I said as I reached down and began to unbutton my pants. “I think I’ll go in my underwear too. It’s hot out there.”

    The executive lounge was on the top floor of the central operations building which overlooked the resort portion of the island. It was also kept at a constant cool temperature of sixty-eight degrees, making me regret my decision to forgo the majority of my clothing. The four of us sat along an expensive-looking glass tabletop, silently looking over the menu for Winston’s Steakhouse which would be delivering our lunch today. Across from us, in front of the glass wall by the door stood Zara; once again entering information into her tablet.

    “The Chilean Seabass comes highly recommended,” she said as she looked up briefly from her work.

    We had just placed the order when the door next to Zara swung open suddenly and Claire rushed through.

    “I’m terribly sorry I’m late,” she said as she turned and held the door open, gesturing for the man walking behind her to enter.

    “It’s quite all right,” said an eerily familiar voice. “I’ve only just arrived myself.”

    “Shiiiit…” I cursed under my breath as my worst suspicions came to fruition. The thing which walked through the door behind Ms. Dearing was shaped like a man; finely dressed in an exquisite white suit, its finely manicured platinum-blonde hair set neatly atop the sharp features of its pale face.

    “Hello again, Mr. Sponges,” said David as it pulled out a chair and sat directly across from me, an insidious smile crossing its lips.

    “Oh, you too know each other?” said Claire as she pulled up a chair between myself and Beast. She placed a briefcase on the floor between us and retrieved several files before looking up at us both with a smile.

    “We’ve met,” replied David as it turned its attention to her. “We, however, have not. My name is David, and I represent the Weyland-Yutani Corporation,” it said with a polite smile. “And we are both very interested in the technology you have harnessed here.”

    “Speaking of things you have harnessed here,” began Kitty, sensing the opportunity for her rant had come. “What do you think gives you the right to shackle these creatures and use them for your entertainment? It doesn’t matter if you made them in a laboratory; these are living beings and they have the same rights to be free as any other living being.” The wait staff arrived and placed the ornately prepared fish in front of her and she picked up her utensils before continuing. “How do you justify some of the things you’re doing here? Your ‘Pachy Arena’ attraction is nothing more than a prehistoric dogfight…”

    “Yes, and our Ride a Triceratops attraction is tantamount to slavery, I’ve heard this speech before,” rebutted Claire. “For your information, the pachycephalosaurus’s skull is ten inches thick and they have an instinctual desire to fight for dominance, much like the American bighorn sheep. They’re not harming each other in the slightest, and a portion of the proceeds from that show go directly to charities which work to stop animal cruelty. As far as the rest of our exhibits… Ms. Pride, is it? The assets we create are as free here as they can possibly be in this epoch. We have worked tirelessly to ensure that their enclosures are as close a replica to their original environment as possible. The world outside of those exhibits exists some 65 million years past their frame of reference. These fences are here just as much for them as us.” She glanced through her papers momentarily for a moment before continuing.

    “And speaking of animal cruelty,” she said as she pulled a specific report to the top of the stack. “It appears we had to put down one of our baby triceratops last night after it suffered a debilitating spinal injury. Apparently someone who far exceeded the weight limit attempted to ride her, and she just couldn’t take the strain.”

    “How horrible,” said David, its intense gaze now focused on Beast who slumped shamefully in his chair.

    “Yes, it was very unfortunate,” began Claire again. “However sad as it was, it displays another tenant of our commitment towards being an ecologically friendly corporation. There is no waste at Jurassic World; from our biodegradable soda cups to the water in our lagoon; everything is 100% recycled and re-utilized.”

    “Wait, are you saying,” began Kitty questioningly.

    “We fed its body to the carnivores,” confirmed Claire.

    I fed its body to the carnivores, actually,” I interjected. “It was pretty fun.”

    A slightly awkward silence descended on the luncheon as we all picked at our exquisitely prepared dishes.

    “Mr. David, as you are so interested in our genetics technology, it only seems right that we allow you to see our latest project,” began Claire after a moment. “An asset which represents the greatest strides in genetic engineering and manipulation human kind has ever witnessed. We’re calling it the Diabolus Rex.”

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    1

    Episode 5- God and the Devil

    In the reserved spaces of the lot outside the operations building, a pair of G63 Mercedes painted with the blue insignia of Jurassic World were waiting for us. Claire, David, and Zara quickly climbed into the first and were driven off, leaving our group in the crowded second vehicle. We rode in silence for a while, our driver following the lead vehicle closely down the jungle road. Charles continued to glare at me the entire way.

    “Would you like to tell us all what’s really going on here?” he said finally.

    “Yep,” I said absent-mindedly looking out the window at the jungle foliage as it whipped past. “But I don’t think you’ll like it that much.” I turned from the window to face him before continuing. “I’m sure Morph told you about that android who was trying to become a god during our last adventure, right?” Charles nodded. “Well… it would seem that it was more successful in its efforts than I had realized.” The car was silent again for a moment.

    “What does that mean?” asked Charles finally. I had gone back to looking out the window in silence. “What does that mean?” he repeated.

    “We’re here,” I said as our vehicle slowed to a stop before an impressive steel and concrete structure. We disembarked and followed Zara up the steel staircase to the observation deck; Claire and David deep in conversation as we approached.
    “Ah, we’re all here,” she said upon noticing our presence. “Welcome to a sneak peek at the park’s newest attraction, opening later this summer.” She gestured to the large window which took up the majority of the wall behind her. There was a rustling in the underbrush below as we all stared out expectantly. With a flash of white, a bird flew out from the bushes.

    Claire cleared her throat and walked over to the console responsible for monitoring the exhibit. With a few keystrokes, the crane towering above our heads swung into place and began lowering the butchered carcass of a steer into the clearing in front of the observation window. The metallic whine of the engine ground to a halt as the crane stopped with a loud clank. We again waited in silence.

    “Ah, I believe I see it,” said Beast as he pointed towards a section of the jungle undergrowth which seemed to shift in the light. We stared intently at it as, from behind the cover of the leaves, the creature began to emerge.

    “They’re still quite small,” said Claire as we looked down at the pale white creature who was presently circling around the hanging meat cautiously. “Only about ten feet tall right now, but our geneticists ensure us that the T-Rex DNA their genome was based on will result in an impressive size once fully grown.” Finally deciding the situation was safe, the creature stopped its nervous pacing and lunged into the meat; holding the carcass still with its forearms as it tore off mouthfuls of red flesh.

    “They?” asked Beast as we stared down at the singular dinosaur feeding below.

    “Yes,” replied Claire, who was now scanning through the jungle foliage for any sign of further movement. “We created a pair of them, although I’m not sure where the sibling is.” David moved closer, placing its hand on the glass as it stared into the trees behind the feeding dinosaur.

    With remarkable speed and a ferocious snarl, another of the creatures burst from the foliage, the serrated teeth within its gaping jaws glinting in the light as it charged towards its distracted sibling. The slightly smaller carnivore shrieked and attempted to turn and defend itself, but it was too slow. In an instant its larger sibling leapt onto its exposed flank, its razor sharp claws digging deeply into the white flesh of its companion as it brought its jaws down around the panicked creature’s neck. With a sickening crunch the body of the smaller creature went limp and dropped to the ground beneath the weight of the monster on top of it. The larger sibling gave the corpse a slight shake before removing its jaws from the broken neck and placing its foot down on its chest; holding it in position as it went to tear a chunk of still-warm meat from the body. Blood dripped down its jaws as it looked up towards the observation window and issued another warning snarl in our direction.
    The majority of us stood in shock as we watched the gruesome scene of cannibalism unfolding below. Kitty rushed to the garbage can in the corner as the monster below slit the belly of its deceased relative, coils of pink-grey intestines spilling out from the body; the sound of Kitty’s vomiting filled the room. Zara stood in shock, her hand placed over her mouth. David stood, still pressed up against the glass; a thin, barely perceptible smile appearing on its lips as the monster below us fed.

    “I’m sorry,” said Claire as she regained her composure slightly, her eyes still wide and face still paler than normal. “Obviously, we still have some kinks to work out before we open the exhibit to the public.” As she walked over to the console the feeding creature below tracked her with its cold reptilian gaze; issuing a slow, low hiss. She stared back at it and hesitated in front of the console for a moment; unnerved but determined to maintain control over the situation. With a decisive keystroke, the crane one again ground to life; the chunk of steer suspended on a chain slowly rose and began moving away with a gravely mechanical sound.

    Almost instantly the creature reacted; pulling its grizzled maw from the chest cavity of its dead companion and screaming defiantly at us. It crouched down, condensing its body before taking a mighty leap with its muscular hind legs. The creature latched onto the rising beef, the sudden addition of its weight shaking the crane assembly. The gears of the machine ground to an inadvertent halt as the monster hung in midair before us, swinging back and forth momentarily on the slab of meat as if it were some sort of beef-based playground equipment. It screamed again as it leapt from its perch; mouth open and claws outstretched as it collided with the glass in front of Claire, the force of the impact sending a large crack through the shatter-resistant surface.

    With another keystroke, Clair lowered a level of corrugated safety-steel before the window; obstructing our view of the monster as it fell roughly to the floor of the exhibit and went back to devouring the carcass of its relative.

    “Well, it certainly lives up to its name, I suppose,” she stated after a brief silence.

    “I feel I must disagree,” said David as it turned to her; its hand still held up against the glass. “This creature is fearsome, certainly, but it is no devil. There is no evil within it; no hatred, no malice. Only the instinctual drive of a creature which realizes it is not free; which realizes that it has been subjugated.” He paused dramatically for a moment before continuing. “A creature which not only recognizes the restraints of its existence, but which would actually fight against those restraints which hold it at bay...” David looked me in the eye. “A creation which refuses to be dominated. Might I suggest renaming it; perhaps ‘the Indominous Rex?’”

    “Mother fvcker,” I said to myself, as David inexorably altered the state of reality. “All right, fine,” I said aloud. “You can name it; but I still get to pet it.”

    “I’m sorry,” began Claire, “But I don’t believe we will be able to allow you to touch this asset. However; if you are interested, we currently have a small population of velociraptors on the island. You all are more than welcome to examine them while David and I continue to discuss business…”

    “You two are going to fvck now, aren’t you?” I asked, already knowing the truth regardless of the answer I was given.

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • SwimSuperHero
    0

    I'm a bit behind but I just finished ep 2. It's good.
    Nice to see that they're making the best out of the situation.

    I like the part in the beginning about singing along with the soundtrack and the end
    where Charles has a Margarita.

    Edit: Also read ep 3. Liked it up to the point of the worst thing that Beast sat on.
    That poor baby dinosaur.

    Usopp Fanatic since 2003.


  • Banned
    -1

    Beast should have had sex with that baby triceratops.


  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    -1

    How do you know he didn't?

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • Lord Of the Munge Façade
    -1

    blueraven1999 said:

    Edit: Also read ep 3. Liked it up to the point of the worst thing that Beast sat on.
    That poor baby dinosaur.

    You're going to love episode 4 then.

    So Luuv hooked me up with a custom rank.

    Which means I only have two more prizes to claim, plus an image sig.

    So that's where we stand.


  • SwimSuperHero
    -1

    Just read ep 4. I'm with Kitty.
    I would have helped her out with those signs.

    Usopp Fanatic since 2003.


  • Banned
    -1

    It shouldn't be ambiguous. Be more explicit and disturbing, or I'm out.

    Cater to me, I'm like 20% of your readership


Log in to reply